How Ridiculous Is This?

The mascot for my daughter's university is called the Masked Rider. This character is adorned in black mask, hat, cape, and rides a black horse. It is most visible during football games, where it gallops out on the field, one hand in the air mimicking a revolver, firing up the students and players with the cry of 'Guns Up'.

This is so wrong on so many levels. It is offensive, and it needs to be recognized as the horrible insult it is. (Bear with me, and read this post all the way through before you pass judgement.)

The rider is caucasian, either male or female. This is an insult to African-Americans, Hispanics, Asians, Eskimos, Native Americans, Southwest Asians, Indians, Samoans, etc ...

The horse is always black. This is discrimination against horses of other colors and their owners.

The horse is run at a gallop across the artificial turf at the stadium. Causing it to run on anything other than natural grass is abuse of the animal, according to PETA.

The cowboy figure, making gun like signs with one hand, is offensive to Native Americans.

The use of a large animal (horse) is discriminatory against schools that have smaller animals as mascots, like A&M's collie.

The use of a fast animal is discriminatory against schools that have slower animals as mascots (Bevo, anyone?).

The Masked Rider is an obvious rip off of Zorro. Therefore, it is an insult to Mexicans who hold the esteemed Hollywood Hero as a symbol of their heritage.

The use of a college student as the rider violates professional cowboy union membership rules.

The horse's inevitable dumps on the artificial turf in the stadium are a direct insult to the manufacturers of the turf.

The use of a mascot in general promotes pride in school, both from students and alumni. Pride in a school is wrong. All schools should be equal, all educations should be the same. Everyone should feel exactly the same about their educational choices. No one has any right or reason to feel any pride in their school - to do so hurts the feelings of those who don't go to that school.


Is this ridiculous? Of course it is, and it is stated with a huge dose of sarcasm. However, there's nothing in here that is any more ridiculous than the incredible amount of manufactured outrage that we hear everyday from some group that feels it needs to be heard about some perceived injustice/discrimination/insult. What a bunch of babies we've become.